Recently, I watched a TED talk by Marisa Peer on how to train our minds to reach beyond our limits.
So much of what she talked about was so relevant to me personally as well as what I talk about in my business. Courage is all about doing things or trying things in spite of what the negative voices in our heads tell us.
When I finished my senior basketball season in college I was afforded two opportunities to continue playing basketball. One was to try out for a Christian team, Athletes in Action, and the other to travel to Europe and try out for teams in pro leagues in Europe. In both cases, I thought the people inviting me must have mistaken me for someone else. I wasn’t good enough for either of these opportunities.
I chose to try out for Athletes in Action for several reasons but the main reasons all centered around fear. When, not if, I failed it would be easier to get home from the tryout in Indiana than the tryouts somewhere on another continent, that’s what the voices told me.
When I showed up for the first practice the voices began to speak loudly. “Look at those guys. They’re good. You don’t belong here. You won’t make it through the first day.” The tryouts were a week long process. There were about 35 other players from all over the country. They would start weeding players out after the second day until there were 12 left.
As we went through the first day I was certain I would be one of the first players cut. Everyone seemed much quicker. They jumped higher, were stronger and flat out better than me. I didn’t hear anything after practice on day two so I showed up for day three. I noticed about a third of the players were wrong. The voices in my head said, “Someone must have forgotten to tell you to go home.”
When I showed up for day four several more were gone and we were down to about 16 or 18 left. Once again, the voices spoke up. “Man, they must not be seeing you mess up all the time.” After day four, we had a meeting in a classroom. We were told to meet back there at 8 am in the morning. As I walked out of the classroom I waited for one of the coaches to grab my arm and lead me back in the room. I had already played out what I would say when they cut me. I would be gracious and thank them for the opportunity. I would wish them well and tell them I had enjoyed the tryout.
I showed up at 8 the next morning and there were 12 guys in the room. I made the team. The voices had already had their coffee and were wide awake with their negative messages. “They must have made a mistake. Or, they’re setting you up as part of a big joke at your expense.” In spite of what the voices said, I made the team.
This happened 43 years ago. The voices are still alive and well but I don’t listen to them as closely as I once did. My courage voice is getting louder and starting to drowned out the negative voices. “You can do this. Even if you fail you will have given it a shot. You’ll regret it if you don’t.”
I believe we are all far more capable than we think we are. I believe we can train our minds to think positively rather than negatively.
Michael Hyatt is a guy I follow very closely in building my platform of courage. I encourage you to check out this post on self-limiting beliefs.
What are your self-limiting beliefs? What do the voices in your head say? How can you begin to think courageously this week?
Have a STRONG and COURAGEOUS day!
Looking for a speaker for an upcoming event? I’d love to be that guy. You can reach me at dave@cultivatecourage.com or 952-200-7499.
You can now buy the book “Cultivate Courage” on Amazon! https://amzn.to/2N2PBVJ
This is an edited version of a post that originally ran on October 9, 2014.
Great Post! Question: How does a person become aware if they have a self-limiting belief or mindset that is holding them back? What if we have a “blind spot” to this in our lives? How did you come to see this in your life?
Thanks for a great question, Dave. I know going through counseling helped me figure out a lot of that. Also, just being aware of what goes on in my head when I am faced with a challenging situation or something the brings fear to the surface. I began to recognize patterns of thoughts. I am now much better attuned than I used to be but I believe it’s an ongoing process. Hope that helps, Dave!