“Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another: “What! You too? I thought I was the only one.” C. S. Lewis
When I started my journey from leading a life of fear to leading a life of courage one of the lessons I had to learn was to acknowledge the role fear played in my life. That was accomplished through some pretty intense counseling. The next step was to have the courage to begin to share my story with others.
As I started to share my story I became well aware of a developing pattern. When I would divulge my fears someone else would say the almost identical words of the Lewis quote that opens this post. “What! You too? I thought I was the only one.” Or, “I thought it was just me.”
Everyone has a story. Everyone has a story of heartbreak or challenge or difficult time in their life. Too often those stories don’t get shared because we all think no one else has been confronted in life like we have. We don’t think anyone can relate to what we are going through. All too often we suffer our fear or our shame or our tragedy in silence because no one will understand.
Now, I’m not suggesting that one needs to broadcast to the world whatever difficulty is befalling them and making life seem unmanageable. What I am suggesting is share your story with someone you trust. Maybe it’s a counselor or a pastor or a close friend. A true friend will walk the journey with you and you will no longer be alone.
Holding our fears and troubles in is a recipe for disaster. Holding our fears and troubles in is similar to a full boiling pot of water. Slowly it starts to simmer. As the heat increases the liquid begins to become more active. If not dealt with the water will spill out in ways that will have a negative impact. Dealing with it before it gets to that point is critical to not having to deal with a mess. So it is with sharing our fears with someone we trust.
It takes great courage to have the vulnerability to share your story. Likely, when you do you’ll hear, “What! You too. I thought I was the only one.”
Looking for a speaker for an upcoming event? I’d love to be that guy. You can reach me at dave@cultivatecourage.com or 952-200-7499.
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