The image of the father and son having a conversation through the window quickly went viral.
The son sat outside his dad’s window of the assisted living facility where he lived. The dad, because of his age and lung and heart issues, is among the most vulnerable during this coronavirus pandemic. Each of them was on their phones as they looked at each other through the window.
Images like this one are always a bit hard for me to view. On the one hand, I’m glad for this father and son that they can get creative and continue to have their daily visits even though they are blocked from physical contact. On the other hand, I get sad because I lost my dad when I was fourteen and I would love to have a conversation with my dad. As I look at the photo of my dad, above, I have so many questions I wished I’d have had the chance to ask him. Like, when and where was this picture taken? I don’t ever remember him driving a boat. He was afraid of the water and always left boat driving to his brother, Leon.
Watching the show “This Is Us” brings up a lot of the same emotions for me. If you’ve never seen the show 3 kids, triplets, lose their dad in a house fire. The show ping pongs back and forth through their lives as kids, teens, young adults, and into middle age. Often the episodes go back to their dad’s death and the impact on their lives. Needless to say, my emotions ride a roller coaster while watching this show.
As I’ve talked about fear and courage for the last eight or nine years many people have shared their stories of fear and need for courage with me. One fear that has come up with some level of frequency is people’s fear of attempting to restore a broken relationship. It’s often between a parent and an adult child or adult siblings.
When I first saw the picture of the father and son conversing through the window, specific people came to my mind who are living their lives craving a conversation even through a window. My heart aches for them. What are the questions that will go unanswered if they don’t act? What are the questions that will go unanswered if you don’t act?
Unfortunately, or, maybe fortunately, this health crisis we are facing is speeding up the need for people to act in an effort to at least attempt to restore what’s been broken with family members or friends. In the past, it’s been easy to say “someday.” Our “somedays” may be disappearing quickly.
Is there a broken relationship in your life that you’ve been waiting for the right time to restore? Are you feeling it’s the responsibility of the other person to take the first step? It would take great courage to reach out. It would take great courage to make that call. It would take great courage to admit your role in the fallout.
Do you have that courage? Maybe your time is running out. Maybe now is your someday.
Might it not work out? Of course that is a possibility. Courage and fear both have a price. It’s a question of which price you are willing to pay. In the words of Kevin from Home Alone as he visits with Old Man Marley who is afraid to visit with his estranged son, “At least you’ll know. Then you could stop worrying about it and you won’t have to be afraid anymore.”
Have a STRONG and COURAGEOUS day!
Looking for a speaker for an upcoming event? I’d love to be that guy. You can reach me at dave@cultivatecourage.com or 952-200-7499.
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