This week is the beginning of March Madness, the annual run to the final four national championship in men’s college basketball
I enjoy watching as many games as I can and, very often, the situations in games remind me of both good and bad memories from my days of playing basketball. Let me share one of those not so good memories.
We were down by two points when I was fouled with one second left on the clock. If I made both free throws the game would go into overtime. The first one went through the net cleanly and we were down by one. Make the next one and we go to overtime.
Missed. Game over. We lose.
It was my sophomore year in college in 1975. After showering I dejectedly headed back to my room. I laid down on my bed, reached over and flipped on the stereo. Linda Ronstadt blared, “You’re no good, you’re no good, you’re no good, baby, you’re no good!”
At that moment, I felt like I was no good. I had let the team down. I had let myself down. We were expected to contend for the conference title and this took a huge bite out of our chances.
There’s no doubt that my missed free throw had an impact on the outcome of the game. The reality is, however, that it was merely one moment in time in a forty-minute game. There were plenty of other things that happened over the previous thirty-nine minutes and 59 seconds that played just as a big a role in that outcome.
So often we focus one moment and let that moment define us. We lost that game but we did end up winning the conference because that one moment was simply that, one moment.
I didn’t let that one moment define me but it was a moment that shaped me as a player. Truth be told, I wasn’t a very good free throw shooter as a freshman and a sophomore. That moment showed me I needed to be better. I learned from that moment.
As a salesman for many years I had many moments that I look back with very little fondness. I remember losing accounts for a variety of reasons. Those were simply moments in my career. They didn’t define me but they did shape me.
An experienced salesperson suggested I reach out to a lost account and ask them what I could have done differently to keep the account. I couldn’t do that! They were now with the bad guys and I didn’t want anything to do with them. I swallowed my pride and, courageously, reached out to the lost account. The customer was very gracious and provided me with information that changed how I dealt with people and how I sold.
It started out as a loss but the net gain was a win because I didn’t let the moment define me but I did let it shape me. The feedback provided by the customer helped me gain new business that I likely wouldn’t have gotten if I hadn’t been willing to change.
Being defined means we are fixed or determined. There is no opportunity for change. Being shaped means we are in process. We are still being created and the outcome is still undetermined.
Have you allowed something from your past to define you? To be shaped means you are willing to look at the events of your past and learn and grow from them, not let them define you.
Do you have the courage to be shaped by those challenging moments or will you let those moments define you?
Have a STRONG and COURAGEOUS day!
