For much of my thirty-seven year marriage my wife and I rarely talked about our finances.
She wanted to, I didn’t.
Money and financial issues were something that I didn’t understand very well and I was afraid to admit my ignorance. If we didn’t talk about it then I didn’t have to reveal my lack of knowledge.
I was fortunate to grow up in a home with wonderful parents. However, I don’t ever remember them having conversations about finances and how they handled them. It wasn’t something that was modeled for me. They may have had those conversations amongst themselves but it wasn’t something I ever witnessed. We didn’t have much so maybe there wasn’t much to talk about.
About ten years ago our church was offering a course by Dave Ramsey titled Financial Peace University. My wife obviously knew of my hesitation to attend something like this but she worked up the courage to ask if I would be willing to go to the course with her.
Reluctantly, and likely with more than a bit of complaining, I worked through my fears and agreed to go. It was a life changing and marriage changing experience.
One of the things that really surprised me was just how big a challenge it is for couples to discuss their finances. If you Google the main reasons for divorce finances is usually in the top 3. I must admit that it felt good to know I wasn’t the only one struggling to talk about money!
The course wasn’t fun. It revealed to me so many of my shortcomings and fears about money. It was hard. I had to admit to many financial mistakes that put us in a hole.
But, the course was very practical. It provided a way for my wife and I to have conversations about our money that I had been avoiding. It provided us with a sensible and understandable roadmap to getting us on the right path to financial freedom.
Through the course we were able to eliminate a bunch of foolish credit card debt, begin to live within our means, and set up a budget plan that we still use today.
About eighteen months after completing the course we went through a real financial crisis. Both of us lost our jobs, we went through all of our savings, and lost our home. However, because of Financial Peace University we didn’t have any credit card debt, or other debt, which would have really put us behind the eight ball. While it was a very difficult time it could have been so much worse.
I must admit to still struggling with talking about our finances. It is an area of great discomfort for me. However, we sit down every two weeks and go over where we are for the month and anything we have coming up for which we need to be financially prepared.
Each of those meetings requires me to set aside my fear and muster up my courage.
Are you afraid to talk about money? If so, have the courage to check out Ramsey’s course. If you are afraid, it will be difficult but your courage will be rewarded!
Have a STRONG and COURAGEOUS day!
Do you need a speaker for an upcoming event? I’d love to be that guy. You can reach me at dave@cultivatecourage.com or 952-200-7499.
You can now buy the book “Cultivate Courage” on Amazon! https://amzn.to/2N2PBVJ
