This is a guest post by Paul Gustavson. Paul is the co-founder and CTO of Simventions, a multi-faceted technology company in Fredricksburg, VA. He has recently released his powerful new leadership book, Leaders Press On, which describes the critical importance of perseverance in any personal or professional endeavor. I highly recommend this book for both personal and professional leadership!
If you’ve ever been to the ocean you have probably taken in the beauty of the crashing surf. It’s mesmerizing! There is something about the power and the majesty of each wave as it rolls in followed by another wave and then another. But the surf can also create havoc for those who are not prepared for it. Waves can pack a punch. They can destroy a coastline. They can batter and capsize a boat. They can tear apart a pier. And even in calmer seas, waves can still be dangerous for those who venture into the surf. The churning water, for those who are not prepared, can pull you under and keep you down. The tide and current can also pull you far away from the safety of the shore. Waves can be deadly.
Our fears are a lot like those waves. Fears, while not as mesmerizing, come crashing at us just the same – often one right after the other. Fears, like waves, can be relentless. They pound and they can pull you under. Over time if the fears get big enough or frequent enough they begin to erode your foundation – your confidence – your outlook. Before too long you might find yourself on sinking sand, or struggling to get your head above the water. Like waves, fears can be debilitating.
But there is a way to ride out the fears just as you can ride out the waves. You see, in the ocean when the waves are a decent size, that’s when they can be enjoyed the most. They can take you somewhere extraordinary.
In college I was only a half hour drive from the ocean. Occasionally, I’d head out to the beach with my budget-minded boogie board to hit the waves. I wanted the waves to be big, the bigger the wave the better the ride. Once I got a good distance from the shore, I’d just wait for the perfect wave. As soon as I saw it coming, I starting kicking toward the shore to try to get a little momentum and catch the wave as it came by. If I was lucky, I could take that wave all the way into the shore. Each time I did that it was an extraordinary experience.
This same idea works for conquering fears too. Fears while overwhelming, and intimidating, and relentless can be something you learn to ride out. And the further you get from the safety of the shore — away from your comfort zone — and the bigger the fear you face the better the experience you might get. Life is meant to be pursued. Your fears are what keep you in your comfort zone. They are there to warn you of potential danger and serve a valid purpose. But what if the fears are there for a different reason too? What if the fears are intended to signal an opportunity?
The fear you might feel could be there because there is something out-of-the-ordinary in front of you. Out-of-the-ordinary is synonymous for extraordinary. To get to extraordinary you have to leave ordinary behind. You have to get out of the comfort zone, and learn to ride the wave of your fears.
There are three ways to ride out your fears and experience the extraordinary.
The first step is to be aware of your fears and what type of fear your facing. In the ocean you can’t ride out a wave unless you see the wave. The same is true of your fears. You need to recognize your fear and identify why you are feeling it. Opportunity often creates fear. The fear you feel wants to keep you right where you are. By recognizing the fear, you can then ask this next question, “Do I really want this fear to keep me from having regrets later?” How you respond to that question will help minimize your fear.
The second step to riding out your fears is to embrace the challenge that the fear exposes. Your mind and heart are under battle – almost constantly when there is fear. That’s because your instinctive mind looks for things to feed and validate fears. It’s been trained to do this since an early age. It’s that fear mindset that keeps you from burning your hand, or jumping off a 20-foot wall. But your instinctive mind is not always right. You need to challenge your instinctive mind. Ask yourself, “will I really be worse off if I ignore the fear and proceed?” If the answer is yes, then “stop”. Your fear is rightly protecting you. But what if most of the time you find the answer is, “No! It’s not going to make me worse off.” If that’s the case, recognize that the fear you face – if you embrace the challenge – is going to create potential improvement in your life. When that happens, then go! Don’t think twice. If it fits your mission, and gets you closer to your vision then execute your plan by taking on the challenge.
The third step to riding of your fears is to stay committed to persevering by learning to be ready to pivot. Fear sometimes makes you want to quit, but if you have momentum going and you hit a little bit of bump and feel the fear again, don’t just bail. Instead learn to pivot. Learn to make some subtle adjustments despite the fear. Nothing of success travels in a straight line. You have to turn a bit to ride out the wave.
Extraordinary can only be found in that place that’s outside of your comfort zone. The discovery of extraordinary is found by riding out your fears! The next time you experience those fears that coming crashing down on your life, the fears that just make you feel uncomfortable, consider how you can ride them out. Take time to recognize each fear – be sure to identify them. Next, be willing to embrace the challenge that the fear is alerting you about. Then finally be ready to make adjustments along the way so that you can experience something extraordinary. Your fears, if you know how to ride them, might just be what you need to reach your potential!
